In her wheelchair she rolls her 85 year-old self out of her bedroom and down the hall of her loving son's home. Naked, she sits, arms pushing the wheels, her adult diaper on her head. Smiling. Her son and his wife's hearts weep.
Would she, at 45, have wanted it so?
She was fine until the doctor gave her some new meds. Then she, 'Went crazy,' her son tells us. 'Just changed almost overnight.'
Is there such a thing as living too long? Wouldn't it be better to die naturally, with dignity, than to exist in a body drugged and strung along? Isn't old age hard enough on all of us - those who have arrived at that stage and those who watch and help - without turning it into an unnatural, massive, soul-wrenching science experiment?
I'm reminded of lyrics, which may be recalled incorrectly, but the sentiment is there.
Makes me sad. Compassion wells up for us all.
____________
Old Folks
The old folks don't talk much
They talk so slowly when they do
They are rich they are poor
Their illusions are gone
They share one heart for two
Their homes all smell of pine
And old photographs
And an old fashioned song
Though you may live in town
You live so far away
When you've lived too long
Have they laughed too much?
Do their dry voices crack
Talking of things gone by?
Have they cried too much?
A tear or two still always seems
To cloud the eye
They tremble as they watch the old silver clock
When day is through
Tick tock, oh so slow
It says yes it says no
It says I wait for you
The old folks dream no more
Their books have gone to sleep
The piano's out of tune
The little cat is dead
And no more do they sing on a Sunday afternoon
The old folks move no more
Their world becomes too small
Their bodies feel like lead
They might look out a window
Or else sit it a chair
Or else they stay in bed
And if they still go out
Arm and arm, arm and arm
In the morning's chill
It's to have a good cry
To say their last good-bye
To one whose older still
And then they go home
To the old silver clock
When day is through
Tick tock, oh so slow
It says yes it says no
It says, I wait for you
The old folks never die
They just put down their heads
And go to sleep one day
They will hold each other's hands
Like children in the dark
But one will get lost anyway
And the other will remain
Just sitting in a room
Which makes no sound
It doesn't matter now
The song has died away
And echo's all around
You'll see them as they walk
Through the sun-filled parks
Where children run and play
It hurts too much to smile
It hurts so much
But life goes on for still another day
As they try to escape the old silver clock
When day is through
The clock goes so slow
It says yes it says no
It says I wait for you
The old old silver clock
That's hanging on the wall
That waits for us all
-------
The life cycle.
I ache.
And am reminded...
..."We simply dare not waste our youth." ~~ Keith Green
Cinnamon rolls.
